I hope you have been well.
March has finally arrived and Spring is right around the corner. So far, this year has been moving by so quickly. Even if I don’t realize it the last month came to an end very quickly.
I am very much looking forward to Spring and sunny days, and while I have been enjoying this lovely California rain I think it’s time for some light.
If you’ve been following me along for a while now you’ll know that I have terrible anxiety and have been able to manage it at most times. However, lately, these past few weeks I found myself anxious about everything. Anxious to the point of not being able to sleep for days.
There is really no explanation or reason for me to feel this way. Life has been good, yet, I can’t seem to find the joy in it. It’s really overwhelming, especially, when it puts your life on a pause.
Even though the days go by so quickly, the hours feel so long for me. I’ll try to find things to do that could make me feel better (i.e.: exercise, taking a bath/shower, watching funny shows.) And while those are only temporary mood boosters I keep finding myself constantly out of it. Worrying about nothing all the time. I’ll get lost in my own mind going through a spiral of thoughts that are never-ending and truly exhausting.
What’s wrong with me?
That’s the first thing that comes to me when I do this and allow for anxiety to make me feel so miserable and lost. It’s not that I am unhappy, but I am also not happy. If that makes any sense.
Anxiety just takes over my life as if it’s the boss of me. Demanding me to get upset at everything. Taking my creativity, getting rid of my passions, sucking the joy out of life. Anxiety is a monster who is prying on me. Waiting for me to have a weak moment so it can conquer my body.
Nothing is wrong with you!
Just like this photo. Anxiety to me is like a storm that passes by. I know that once it has gone the sun will come out and will shed light on all beautiful things.
And so, I take my resolutions and goals I gave myself and do all the things that will help me be the best me.